All my eyes want to do is close, I feel like since days ago my eyes have been wanting to shut. I have been tearing up, and I blamed my mascara until today when I started to tear up again coming back from my mentors house. I had went into the bathroom when I realized that I forgot to put my mascara on. I no longer had a culprit for my discomfort to blame it on. Then what was it? I feel like it was an on going battle for me. I slept well last night, I was rested. Today was a content day of edits and fighting with myself again and again to stay still and just finish.
As I did my work I noticed that speed, while it is my gift, it’s also my curse. The jumping around that I am doing didn’t allow me to completely focus before I wanted to get the next thing done. How many times I had to go back and fix something was endless and at one point I had to remove videos and start from scratch.
Eventually I didn’t know if it was my eye or the videos that were making me so frustrated. My Mentor told me that I wasn’t paying attention. Obviously not, I am avoiding feeling my eyes tear.
Even while I am typing this my right eye is closed and tearing, my eyes defiantly hurt now and I feel that this is my intuitions way of telling me to stop. So good night for now. <3